During these trying times, there is so much fear, loss and failure. This pandemic has brought out many people's limiting and debilitating beliefs such as:
“I will lose everything”
“I will not survive this “
“I'm not good enough “
If there was ever a time to challenge our limiting fear-based beliefs, it is now.
Where do these limiting beliefs come from?
For many, these powerful beliefs were formed from prior painful events and experiences in our life that have negatively impacted us. Limiting beliefs keeps us stuck, reinforcing with worst outcome fears and are self-fulfilling. They keep us trapped, stuck paralyzed and remove any potential choices to change our state. Limiting beliefs cause us to live our life in fear during these scary times. Beliefs in general determine everything we do and our values determine direction. Our values that underpin all of this determine our emotional state.
During these challenging and scary times, it is easy for many to feel fear, rejection, failure, anger and sadness as a result of our limiting beliefs. As you can see, these values, based on our beliefs, can cause us to fly away or TO AVOID. These are distancing values from leaning into our ability to gain success, resiliency and thrive during difficult times. In these very times, we can not withdraw, avoid or distance ourselves.
We need to be aware of our limiting beliefs and operating values that cause us to remain stuck. Limiting beliefs that cause suffering are never based on the facts – but on our perception. Our beliefs can be either positive or limiting and do lead to value responses. Remember, limiting beliefs lead to values grounded in disconnection followed by different emotional states such as sadness, fear, anger, rejection, helplessness, failure, and loneliness.
What do we need to do?
STOP trying to avoid or hide your fears, and instead start moving towards your fears and challenge these limiting debilitating beliefs. Rather than being lead by disconnecting and isolating painful values - "how can I tap into action oriented values that can positively unstick and create a positive shift out of my situation"
Below are a list of positive action values that create the resiliency to help us shift our emotional state, and drive solutions. What would happen if these action values become our core personality strengths to living life. Whatever you fear right now, write out what you fear most right now, and go down this list of action values, one at a time and explore positive optional solutions for each category to your situation. What you will find is so many possibilities and inner strengths to start a process to cope, manage and move towards and positive shift in your state and situation.
Creativity: New ways of thinking and acting.
Curiosity: Exploring and seeking for its own sake.
Open-mindedness: Seeing things objectively and fairly, from all sides.
Love of learning: Constantly developing skills and knowledge.
Perspective: Seeing in ways that make sense and giving wise counsel.
Bravery: Not shrinking from threat, challenge, difficulty, or pain; acting on convictions even if unpopular.
Persistence: Seeing things through, despite difficulties.
Integrity: Presenting oneself in a genuine way; taking responsibility for one’s feeling and actions
Vitality: A zest and enthusiasm for life and living.
Love: Valuing, sharing and caring for others.
Kindness: Doing things for others without requiring reciprocation.
Social intelligence: Being aware of how yourself and others are motivated, and acting accordingly.
Citizenship: Being socially responsible and loyal.
Fairness: Treating everyone in a similar way. Being just and without bias.
Leadership: Driving achievement whilst maintaining harmony.
Forgiveness and mercy: Forgiving wrong-doers rather than seeking punishment or revenge.
Humility / Modesty: Not putting oneself above others. Letting achievements speak for themselves.
Prudence: Not taking undue risks or doing what you will regret.
Self-regulation: Controlling one's emotions and actions according to one's values.
Wonder: Appreciating beauty and excellence.
Gratitude: Knowing, feeling and being thankful for all the good things in life.
Hope: Positively expecting the best and working to achieve it.
Humor: Enjoying laughter and making people laugh. Seeing the lighter side of life.
Spirituality: Having coherent beliefs higher purpose and the meaning of life.
So, did you find some solutions? Do you have a plan? How can you make steps towards enacting your next steps? Have you created an inner shift towards hope?
Remember to be aware of your limiting patterns of behaviour and challenge them. Knowing what to do and doing what you need to do are two different things. If you know what to do, and yet don't do it- then you really don't know it. You need to take action now, make forward moving steps. Be aware of those limiting beliefs - because they want to keep you stuck, paralyzed and want you to fail. Don't listen to them because they are inner untruthful thoughts and return back to your ACTION VALUES.
Changing your thoughts and changing your state leads to changing your emotions!